Monday, May 27, 2013

10 Things I Would Tell The Cast of Mad Men If They Had the Internet in the 1960's (based off last night's episode)

1. Megan Draper-Start acting like a damn adult. This isn't grade school. No one has cooties. Ok, some girls do. Watch out.

2. Peggy- you should have dumped your boyfriend episodes ago. He's a loser, a bum or any other word synonymous with failing at life. I was seriously waiting for you to push the knife deeper in the ambulance.

3. Abe- you are a douche. That is all.

4. Roger just wants a boy to be a father/grandfather to. Why does it have to be so hard? Maybe he can adopt one from Brangelina- they have like, a bunch. Then again, they aren't alive yet- it's the 60's.

5. Roger's daughter- see what I said to Abe. Wait- you are too lazy to scroll up one inch? Ok, fine. You are a douche, too.

6. Betty- you look like you have been doing p90x. Or p45x since it was a long time ago. Glad to see you're back to being sexy again.

7. Don- it's time to make up your damn mind. This vulnerable, wimpy Don is very, very lame. Stop picking unnecessary fights at work and at home and chasing women who see through your crap. Go home, wimpy Don. You're drunk.

8. Pete- I would have never guessed you'd be on the other end of the "Most Annoying Characters in Season 6" spectrum. Congratulations- now go start not sucking at your job/life.

9. Bobby Draper- Stop being such an attention whore. I want to punch you square in your face.


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